Sunday, May 4, 2008

Troubles on the cheesewagon

I just found out that Peridot was having trouble with some of the kids on the bus. They were making fun of her name. Typical kid stuff but it irritates me none the less. My first reaction is to contact the school and talk to the bus driver but I know that it will only make things worse if I do those things. The other option that I see is to teach her how to deal with people like that. She will have to learn sometime... I guess now is better than later. So against my better judgement I have devised a few things that she can say to the other kids to shut them down. I know that P wont like to say them because she truly is a Gem. She doesn't like to be mean to anyone except Diamond, but that is to be expected.

What do you tell your child to say to other kids that is within a healthy criteria of phrases that will diffuse a situation instead of fuel it? There are the classic phrases like "your momma" or "whatever". There is a new one that seems to work well. I learned it from a friend and it is mostly used in jest but I think it might work. If someone calls you a name just say "So's your face". I mean... what can any one say back to that except the same thing. Then when they do say it back you can laugh at them and say "You're sooooo original" then shake your head and walk away. Or talk to someone else if your on the bus.

It has been my experience that if someone is picking on you, all that needs done is for you to point out one of their flaws to the group. Then the group will begin picking on them and you can walk away with your pride intact.

But does a child think like that? I don't think so. In a world where social standing is so important one little put down can be devastating. Especially if you don't have the confidence to tell yourself that they are just hating on you and that what they say doesn't really matter. How do you teach a child confidence? I think it is by giving them the tools to handle bullies.

I think it is time to start teaching my girls how to defend themselves both emotionally and physically.

2 comments:

Apple Joos said...

Man am I glad I don't have to deal with that! Sheesh!

; )

tiarastantrums said...

Isn't it just terrible that we as parents have shielded are children from such acts. Then we entrust our babies to they 'system' to take care of our children in the same manner. Due to the bullies and meanies out there, our children are exposed to issues that we don't want them to deal with yet. Just heartwrenching!
I tell my son (and nephew has this issue as weell at his school) to tell the bullies to "Bugger Off"!